Saturday, January 1, 2011

Misplaced Faith

Have you ever considered yourself a servant or been told you are; someone who had rather put others ahead of yourself? Have you ever completely put yourself in a position that could ultimately put your life in danger in order to help a friend or loved one? Have you ever been there to help someone turning every ounce of energy to them without regards for your own wellbeing? Sometimes we can get worn down or even torn down. Then, the tables are turned and you are the one in need. But disappointment prevails rather than help. Jesus knew that disappointment and even that hurt.

Mark 14: 32-41
32 They went to a place called Gethsemane, and Jesus said to his disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” 33He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled. 34“My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,” he said to them. “Stay here and keep watch.”
35Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him. 36“Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”
37Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Simon,” he said to Peter, “are you asleep? Could you not keep watch for one hour? 38Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak.”
39Once more he went away and prayed the same thing. 40When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. They did not know what to say to him.
41Returning the third time, he said to them, “Are you still sleeping and resting? Enough! The hour has come. Look, the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. 42Rise! Let us go! Here comes my betrayer!”

Jesus’ disciples could be referred to in our day as best friends. They had been through so much together during their travels together. Jesus had taken care of His best friends. He had taught them, fed them, given them rest and assurance. He had shared some of His inner most secrets with them. Imagine guys, sitting around watching a ball game with your best pals; or ladies, sitting around over coffee or shopping together for those “to die for” pair of shoes. Guys and ladies, during your “man” or “girl” times you are sharing little intimate secrets with your best guy or gal friends. This is the relationship Jesus had with His disciples. Jesus knew He could depend on His friends. After all, haven’t they been through the toughest of times together? Couldn’t they depend on each other even to the ends of the earth? Of course! That’s what friends (especially friends as close as they were) do for each other.

The time was closing in for Jesus. He knew the time was close at hand for Him. This was the “dark” time where He could really use His friends. He carried them up to Gethsemane. He knew He needed to pray and that He could use someone lifting Him up in prayer. We all know how that is, don’t we? Sometimes we just need to know that there is someone who is in constant prayer for us. There are those times when we are in a “dark” time where we need someone praying for us. Sometimes during those times we find it hard ourselves to pray.

Jesus even told His friends that He was deeply distressed and troubled. All He asked of them was for them to sit and keep watch while He prayed. I would have thought (seeing as how they were such close friends) that they would have offered to pray with Jesus or at least pray for Jesus while He went farther into the garden to pray himself.

What happened! Jesus came back and found His friends in deep distress with Him? Jesus found them with their faces buried carrying the burden for Jesus in prayer? No! He found them asleep! Jesus came up to them and said “What?! You mean you couldn’t even stay awake for an hour for me?!” Jesus left them again and went back into the garden to pray. He came back again to the same scene as before. His friends were asleep again. This time it was too late. They were coming after Jesus.

In your deepest darkest trials, do you have friends you can count on or do they fall asleep during their watch? I’m sure we have all had friends or even been a friend like the disciples. I’m sure the disciples loved Jesus and in their hearts they wanted to do all they could for Him. But, Jesus knew his friends were human and they could only do so much. As humans we become tired, weak, frail and even undependable. We mean well, but the human aspect will only allow us to do just so much. Jesus went to the only source He knew He could count on and that would never leave nor forsake Him. He turned to His Father.

We should not put our faith solely in family or friends. Humans will disappoint you; sometimes unintentionally but regretfully, sometimes intentionally. As we go through trials and tribulations we need to keep our focus on God. He is the true and ultimate best friend. He is the one we can always depend on and will always have our best interest at heart.

If you are struggling with something that you feel is more than you can handle alone or you don’t know which way to turn; turn toward God. Jesus did. He could have talked with His friends, but He knew the One He needed to seek. You don’t have to carry your burdens alone. His shoulders are wider than ours and His strength is 100 times greater than ours. Let Him carry them for us. He is your best friend and He is waiting for you to ask for His help.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

New Year--New Person

2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. -- NKJV

As I came across this scripture it reminded me of what was quickly coming upon us. Another new year…another year of new resolutions…new promises to ourselves and to others.

As we go into another year we leave the old year behind us. The mistakes we’ve made are left in the old year while a fresh start is ahead of us. Even if the mistakes we made have to be carried with us into the New Year, we still have the opportunity to turn things around…to make things right or better.
The same thing holds true with our souls in eternity. When we ask Christ into our lives, trust in and live for Him…we become a new creation. The old person we were is left behind us and a fresh start is in front of us. We have become a new creation in Him.

What’s so amazing is that we as humans put things behind us and think we are going to never bring them up again. But in reality we know that will not happen. We every now and then turn back to what we said we would never remember. But Christ doesn’t do that. When we ask Him into our lives, He puts our sins behind Him…as far as the east is from the west…to never remember them again. See, we are new creations. New creations in Him. Before we became Christians, we were of the world, living in and for the world. Christ doesn’t remember all we did in that time. We on the other hand, will still let them come back. That’s Satan working and trying to get us to believe other than what God promises us. That’s another blog for another time.

I will ask anyone reading this that if you have never asked Christ into your life as your personal Savior, please do so now. Please start the New Year as a New Person.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Christmas Morning

Today is my 50th Christmas morning. Like most people, I don’t have much recollection of the first couple of my Christmases. But, the beginnings of my memories are full of laughter, excitement, love, smells and wonder.

The first thing I remember even as a child would be waking to the wonderful smells or Turkey, Ham, dressing, dumplings and the rest of the feast that was fit for a King! My mama and daddy would start Christmas Eve preparing for our wonderful meal which would always include numerous deserts. One of my daddy’s prize creation was his homemade coconut cake and my mama’s was her 12 layer chocolate cake. At least these were MY favorites of their labors!

My brother and I would get up on Christmas morning and head down to the kitchen where we knew we would find mama and daddy. We were then directed to where the tree was to see what Santa had left and to open presents. We couldn’t begin anything until mama and daddy made their coffee and joined us. Then the camcorder and camera would start their jobs. Daddy would read to us from the Bible. We always would hear The Christmas Story out of Luke, chapter 2. Then he would pray. That is a wonderful memory I hope will stay with me the rest of my life. A memory of knowing that before anything was done, my parents would always make sure we knew and understood what Christmas was about. First and foremost it was about a baby who was born in a manger; a baby who was born of a virgin and sent to grow up and die for my sins; a baby who willingly came knowing He would die just so I would have eternal life. All I had to do was accepted Him as my personal Savior, believe in Him and live for Him.

Next came the presents. We would take turns opening so we could enjoy everything that everyone had. Billy and I would always get too much. We always did. We weren’t rich by any means but mama and daddy always made sure our needs and most of the time…the majority of the time…our wants were met as well. We would finish opening gifts and while Billy and I got things in order…well, played with all we had gotten…mama and daddy would finish cooking the meal.

We would all four join together at our table along with Tommy and Phyllis (my uncle and aunt on daddy’s side) and try our best to devour some of everything that was put in front of us. After the meal we would take a nap, get up, start over with the food and talk about the day.

That was the recollections of my first 48 years of Christmas. For the past two years it has been different. My daddy passed away April 2, 2009. Last Christmas was just a blur. I remember spending the whole day in bed. That was my recollection of last year. This year is somewhat different. Mama, Billy and I did exchange presents. We did put up a 3 ft Christmas tree on the memorial table we have prepared for daddy. Mama fixed a ham and we will have ham sandwiches for Christmas lunch.

However, this Christmas morning I woke up to silence, no smells except for the coffee brewing, sadness and a dread of getting out of bed. I knew once I was up and the day starting the floods of memories would soon be coming from my eyes in the form of tears. I would have to see the sadness on my brother’s face and the despair on my mama’s.

But, before I got out of bed I watched the part of “Charlie Brown Christmas” where Linus was telling what Christmas was all about. What a way to be hit back into reality and have my focus put in priority.

I miss my daddy with all my heart. Christmas will NEVER be the same without him here. In my human heart I want him here with me but in my Christian heart I am in such awe of the Christmas he is having with our Savior. He is in the presence of the One who is the whole reason for Christmas. What better Christmas could my daddy be having and how dare I be so selfish that I would want him back and away from all that glorious celebration. Yet I’m still human as we all are. I know I’m not the only one feeling this way this year. But, I do hope that if you are feeling these same feelings you are also aware of the reason for Christmas.

I am a child of the King! I am a Princess. Wow! What more could I ask for Christmas? I am rich beyond measure and loved beyond measure. I have my family, friends and a father in Heaven along with my Heavenly Father.

Merry Christmas everyone. I pray that you will have the best Christmas ever and if you don’t know my Savior as yours that you will allow Jesus to give you the Christmas present He has for you. Please unwrap that eternal gift of salvation.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Fabulous 50th Birthday!

Today was the day I celebrated that 50th milestone in birthdays. In my previous blog "Facing Fifty," I mentioned having a wave of different emotions as I faced this day. Some of the concerns were "who will remember", "who will forget", "will this turn out to be my special day"? The results of the much anticipated day went as follows:

I was awake at 5:00 AM...WIDE AWAKE! I checked out my Facebook while the majority of my friends were still sleeping. After briefly surfing the internet, I decided to see if anything good was on television. If you like infomercials, you would be thrilled at the early Saturday morning television schedule. Giving up on that I decided I would try to go back to sleep. That lasted about an hour. Deciding it was time to take Jasper out for his morning stroll, I climbed out of my warm bed and unconsciously made a smart and out of the ordinary reach for my housecoat. When opening the door to outside, I knew at that point as the cold air hit my face that I would probably be up and awake for the remainder of the day. Making my way back in from the cold and back to the comfort of my warm bed, I climbed back in and snuggled under the covers at the slight chance of falling asleep. At exactly 6:55 AM, a text came in on my phone. This was the beginning of the wave of emotions I had been anticipating.

My first birthday wish was a very special one. It came in from my bestest buddy/sister. It was very fitting that the first would be from her. From there came the overwhelming and loving best wishes from family and friends on Facebook, texts and phone calls. One call that came in was from my aunt and uncle. My aunt sang "Happy Birthday" to me (she does not sing for anyone). Needless to say this was an honor! Somewhere in between all of the wonderful show of love from everyone, the emotions started running rampant. The feelings of missing daddy took over and I curled back up in my bed. This is where I feel my most comfort. I can close out emotions and the world. But, this time I took charge and not my emotions. After a short time of crying I decided I was not going to spend my birthday going deeper into the depression pit. Not today! Still being the only one in the house awake, I decided to try the television again. I found a marathon of "The Nanny." This show can always put a smile on my face! During this time I received another text (one out of quite a few) that was very special. It was from a friend (she seems more like a sister) that God just recently brought into my life. We have never met but I feel like we have known each other forever. Again, it was very fitting timing for a text like this.

The others were finally up and I heard rustling at the other end of the house. Billy and mama had fixed up the dining area like a small party for me. It was so neat, with everything from cupcake, presents, candy goody bags and banner! Then they took me out of town for a nice dinner and a little shopping. Now I am cuddled back up in my warm bed with my laptop, Jasper and a Diet Dr. Pepper. Also, during the day I found out that my bestest buddy/sister had wanted to give me a surprise 50th birthday party. While she was still in the planning process in her mind, she had the fall from her horse causing her concussion and not long after that her mother passed away. This planning/wanting may not seem like anything to some, but to me it made my heart feel so good that she would even consider going through all of that to plan me a party. That's love.

So, has this been a day that I have felt special? Have I felt loved, cared about and set aside for my special day? There is no way in the world I could have felt anything less than that! This has been a magical, wonderful, blessed and loved day. I will remember this day for as long as I live. Is 50 as special as 49? Yes, it is. I still don't understand why, but it just is. So, with this day almost behind me...I am already anticipating the wonderful things that will be happening to me throughout this year until I reach 51!!!

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Facing Fifty

On December 11th I will be facing a milestone in my life. Yep...my 50th birthday. With this particular birthday comes a string of different emotions. I have never been one who is ashamed to tell my age. When asked I don't think of shaving a year or two off my age but always say "I am (whatever my age) " with a huge smile. Then I proceed to tell my captive audience my story of God's mercy and my cancer. I was diagnosed with breast cancer in October 1996. I had gone to my physician because of a lump in one breast and was sent for a mammogram. However, the results showed a mass in the other breast. I was scheduled for a biopsy and the results of that showed positive for cancer. My physician informed me that I had the fastest growing cancer I could have and had it not been found when it did I wouldn't be here for the next Christmas. So, needless to say I feel very blessed for every birthday I have. God had been working in every aspect of my life months before my diagnosis to prepare me for that time. This story is going to be for another blog. Now, back to the different emotions I am feeling now as I face this milestone.

As with all milestones in your life, you think of the loved ones that are not going to be around for that particular time. My daddy passed away April 2, 2009. It was awkward and somewhat sad on my last birthday; the first without him. But somehow, this particular birthday is different. Daddy and I use to joke about me turning 50. Daddy has been here for everything in my life. All the good and the bad. But, now all of a sudden a sadness comes over me that my daddy will not be here to share this time with me. I so much miss my daddy every day, but especially very special times like this.

I, in some ways would like for this day just to go by without a fuss. Just treat it as any other day. I'm no one special. It's just a 50th birthday. Why is "50" such a special number anyway? What about my 49th? Why was it not as special as the 50th?!!! But, there is something within me that thinks "HEY, I AM GOING TO BE 50!!! IT'S SPECIAL, DON'T FORGET ABOUT ME!!!" I want to be special for a day. I want to be the center of attention. I want to be treated special...JUST ONE TIME FOR ONE DAY! Does that seem selfish? Is that expecting too much? Maybe...Probably...Yes!!! That's not really me, but I guess everyone sometime in their life wants to feel special. But, I don't want that "special" to happen because I have said something. I don't want to remind anyone. I would love for people to remember because they love me and because they have thought about me.

I also look at my life and think that I'm going to be 50! What have I done with my life...who have I touched in my life...have I even touched anyone's life...what have I done for God...am I where God wants me to be...is there another direction I need to go now...have I done all I can for my family and friends...have I been so selfish I haven't done for those I love?

Is this the "thinking" of someone reaching midlife crisis? Or is this the "thinking" of someone just being childish and immature? Whatever the reason for the thinking, I am very blessed by whatever age I reach. I am thankful for the family, friends and blessings God has given me throughout my life.

Whatever happens on my birthday, I will be back to fill you in!!!

Who I Am

Hi, readers! My name is Lou Ann Gibson. I am a Christian, I love my Lord and love talking about Him and sharing about all He's done for me. It's way too much to go into here in the introduction but, if you continue to follow my blog you will definitely hear a lot about the many blessings God has bestowed upon me!

I am a single (never been married), childless, almost 50 year old woman. I will reach my 50 year milestone December 11th. I stay at home with my mama, my brother and my boy Jasper (my dog, best friend and confidant). My daddy (the greatest man I ever knew) passed away April 2, 2009. This was one of the darkest days of my life.

I am a breast cancer survivor since 1996. This is another story that is too long to get into in the introduction but goes along with the many blessings God has given me that will be told in later blogs! One of my passions in life is working with youth. God has not blessed me with my own children but has RICHLY blessed me through church, family and friends with so many! I love each of them and can't tell how they have enriched my life. Don't get me wrong...there have been times when I thought "Wow! I am so glad this isn't a 24/7 deal with children." and then there are times then I think "How wonderful it would be to have all of this with the kids 24/7."

Some of the things I enjoy doing in my spare time are photography, writing, reading and traveling. I don't seem to find the time I need to do much of any of these but I see all of that changing in my near future. Or, at least I hope I see that happening!

This is just a little of who I am to get you started. The more you read of my blogs the more you will get to know who Lou Ann Gibson is.